I recently downloaded an app by recommendation of a friend called Marco Polo. The purpose of Marco Polo is to send video messages back and forth like you’re on a call, but without needing to be free at a specific time to talk with someone. This has been incredibly more convenient to be able to see and share updates with the people I love. One of these people is my grandma; who has done a great job of making me greatly miss her boisterous laugh and our deep long conversations. One thing that she has shared with me through Marco Polo is how, working in a similar environment, her heart was broken by the work. As I spoke to her about my personal experiences and continued to mull over my situation in the coming weeks, I was shocked. I took a moment to consider how I should be feeling in the present moments.
I spoke to myself saying, “I should be tired; I should be wilted or weak; I should be discontent, or constantly searching for the next break; yet I am not”. That is what is a shocking reality. I am energized, and strong, and overwhelmingly content with where I am. I hardly want to go on a vacation in a week for the time I will miss with the girls.
It is incredible because it wasn’t like this in the beginning. I was tired before, I felt weak, I was annoyed with small insignificant things—sometimes making me incapable to see my blessings. I would still feel this way if it were not for the strength of God.
As my grandma spoke to me through this video, she expressed how she has been praying for God to give me strength in this environment. It was the first time that I realized that I have it. I have been seeking the presence of God and asking for Him to draw near to me, not even recognizing how close He is. He is overwhelmingly present in the strength and joy He brings me each day. I can only give sincere gratitude to my grandma and others that have been praying this for my benefit. Even though I am here in Ecuador independently, I am acutely aware that I am far from alone. Your prayers cross oceans to meet me where I am; I can’t think of anything more deeply encouraging than that. Most importantly, I want to give thanks and glory to my great God who gives strength and joy in abundance to those who ask. I can not emphasize enough that He gives me GREAT joy. Everything that I am currently doing is by His power alone, and to this respect I want to continue working to glorify Him in every word and action.
Just this week, we had a world race group come to join us in service. There are eleven girls living in the foundation Monday-Friday, serving and giving their energy wherever they can. It has already been such a privilege to get to know and serve with them these past
couple of days. I can’t wait for so many more opportunities to better learn how God is working in their lives. One project that has begun with all of their help is community outreach. I went a couple of times in the past week to spend time with kids in a nearby community—playing soccer, teaching Bible stories, coloring, and talking with them. It was a rich change in scenery (though it doesn’t affect how much I love having time with the girls).
On Thursday night, we had dinner with the world race group, our leaders, and the pastors from the community we are now serving in. The wife of the pastor shared her moving testimony about how God’s power worked in her life; healing her when she had terminal cancer and saving her from a very dark life. I have felt that many sermons, testimonies, and events in the past weeks—including my personal experiences where God has given me strength—have all been ways He wants to show me just how much power He yields; more than I could ever dream of. It is evidence to how His hand is absolutely moving in every moment; even when His power doesn’t always look radical as through a miracle, it IS radical because our lives are miracles. It is a gift that I am moving, breathing, and living today. I am so grateful for this woman and the courage she had in sharing her testimony.
I have felt God teaching me many lessons in the past couple of weeks, and have
experienced a lot of treasured fellowship that didn’t end on Thursday. I attended an IF conference this past Saturday at the church I am attending here in Quito. For those who don’t know, IF is a large conference of Christian women that has speakers for two days preaching on different topics. While it is held in Texas, any church can purchase the material for a weekend to give their own little conference, and that is what mine did. I was there from 8 AM to 5:30 PM that day and boy did God convict me of some things!! We talked about truth, about honesty, about vulnerability, and about idolatry. A lot of these cultivated into a big slap in the face that I needed. I like to call this slap “busyness is not a virtue!”
When I evaluate where my head and heart have been rooted during my service, it has been in achievement. Who the devil can’t destroy he’ll discourage. When God gave me strength and joy to combat his discouragement, He had to also remind me what I’m here for. Throughout my life I have often gotten over involved and spread myself thin. This is because part of my identity is rooted in always being busy so that I could call myself productive and say I’m doing it all. This is what I was taught:
Part 1- idolatry: Busyness is an idol that takes me away from God, when I no longer take the time to be with Him in stillness.
Part 2- honest vulnerability: A lot of what I’m currently doing is entirely for approval and personal validation, rather than what God placed me here for - to glorify Him.
Part 3- truth: My truth is not God’s truth. My truth is that everything that I’m doing in giving of myself is good and I don’t need help. My truth allows me to stay comfortable where I am and feeds my feelings. God’s truth exposes what I need to change within myself and turn from, to choose Jesus.
So while God has been faithful to me in giving me strength and joy in this work, it is my turn to be faithful to Him in using His strength for His glory; letting go of the responsibilities that I have that I am doing for validation and focusing on the ones that God had initially called me here for; because it is truly by His power alone that I have the capability for any of it.
It’s time for me to realize that asking for help is not a weakness but an understanding that God did not create us to be individual but made for community.
Thank you to this community for helping me through consistent prayer and thank you to my community in Quito for helping throughout this season.
Highlights:
Making pies for an event that the foundation had showcasing the girls’ progress with horseback riding (and Teo sitting on the horses)
Time in fellowship with several friends: going out to eat or have coffee and having the opportunities for lots of authentic conversation
trying encebollado (onion soup) ice cream and which was pretty weird
playing soccer in the pouring rain and mopping grace’s flooded apartment right after
Hanging out in the park with some new friends from Living and Learning
Finding peanut butter (finally!!!!) in the frutería that is all natural and cost $2
Prayer Requests:
For the world race girls as they get adjusted to a new culture and are working to be servants of Christ
For my parents who are flying into Quito in less than a week!!!!
That I am continuing to hear what God is telling me and turning toward what I need to change in my daily life
Thanks simply for the goodness of God and His almighty power at work
I acknowledge that this is quite a lot to unload on you all, but it is important that I am sharing all God is teaching and am held accountable to it in that way. Thank you for your grace and time in reading it through. :)
Con Cariño,
Sara <3
Hey Sweet Girl! This blog is the best yet and not because you mentioned me!
Your honesty and vulnerability is so precious and refreshing! Stay this way!
Continuing to pray for Grace to finish this next part of your race! Mom and Dad will be with you so very soon. Enjoy every moment! Then back to ministry and God’s work both in and through you.
I have watched your Marco Polo twice and will respond soon. Grandpa and I were at a conference Monday through Wednesday and we have leadership school this weekend!
Sending you heart love and prayers, Grandma